No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
