remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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