these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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