She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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