so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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