Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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