Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
