I think I am morally bankrupt
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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