Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize