Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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