She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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