I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
