grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
