Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
