how can u be prego again
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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