Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
