I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
