i'm lost and i look like a hooker
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
