I'm gonna have a badass scar
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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