That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
