I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Randomize
