great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Randomize
