she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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