Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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