I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
