Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
