i just google imaged poop.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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