There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
