the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
