i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
