That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
