good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
