I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
