i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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