Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
