bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
