no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
