very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
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