you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
