You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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