isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
