she was so not down for the gang bang
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
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