my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize