Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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