they need to just BURY HIM!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
