I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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