Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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