This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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