one might say we're banned from that church
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
