I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I wish i was in the wii world.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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